Friday, June 20, 2008

A CONVERSATIONS EXCLUSIVE: Our Interview with Bobby Blake

Conversations Book Club is pleased to share one of the most intriguing interviews we have conducted to date! The man who is known in the adult film industry as Bobby Blake is no stranger to attention. Now after retiring from the entertainment world, he has penned a memoir that people of all walks of life will be talking about. MY LIFE IN PORN reveals much more than he could have exposed in any movie, and his story of how his path could not have been any different is one that will resonate with many.

This is our conversation:

Bobby, thank you for taking out the time to talk with me about your new memoir MY LIFE IN PORN. There is alot I want to discuss with you about the book, but I first want to ask you why did you decide to write and release it now?
Although I have been retired from the porn industry for seven years now, thanks to the internet my work continues to be available all over the world, and my fan-base has continued to grow as a result of that. My fans have so many questions about my life in the industry, and many of them have no real understanding of the business and how it works. That in part caused me to want to answer their questions about my time in the adult industry and from that came the book. People also saw - and see - me as something of a role model, and come to me for advice and guidance, so I also wanted to share with them the complex human being behind the Bobby Blake facade, and let them know about the experiences I went through in my life that made me who I am today.


Your faith is something that is talked about throughout the book. Like myself, many may not realize that you were a minister before you became involved in the industry and are a minister now. My obvious question to you is how has your faith affected the decisions you have made?
My faith in God is very strong, and has always been with me. But like many gay or bisexual people I felt pulled in many directions by the way the world treats us. On the one hand I was a minister, yes, but on the other there was a journey I needed to go on out into the world, like the Prodigal Son, who has to go and have certain experiences before he learns better and returns, contrite. And I returned, tempered, able to give back to the community in a way I could not otherwise have done. So I believe that, strange as it sounds, my sojourn in the world of porn was all part of God's plan for me. After I retired from the industry I took time off before reentering the ministry. The power of God is stronger than eyes could see or ears have heard. I believe that and will always believe that.

What about those who attended your church? What was their perspective of your career choice?
When I was a minister my congregation were in fact very tolerant of the fact that I was in partnership with another man. This was because of the way I carried myself. I neither hid nor flaunted my sexuality, and always presented myself in a masculine, respectable way. I stepped down as minister at that church before I became involved in the adult industry: the two roles didn't seem to me to belong together: they were like oil and water. At the church I work at now, as a counselor with young people troubled by their sexuality, everyone knows about my past and accepts it. They understand that it is because I've had the experiences I've had that I am able to advise without judging. And for my part, though I often enjoyed it, I would never recommend anyone to become involved in the adult industry. But in the end it's not about me. It's about what is right and wrong to God.

Bobby, one of the parts of the book that really touched me was when you were ministering in the hospital to those who were afflicted with HIV/AIDS. You say in the book "Burnt onto my mind is the face of a young woman who had lost her child to AIDS shrieking to God, "Take me and leave her here! It's not her fault!" She, herself was HIV+, but her daughter had died firt, over in another hospital. I had to tell her that her daughter had passed. How can you comfort someone in that situation? But Id did the best I could. (p.109)" How has the disease affected the way you live your life?
For years you know that HIV/AIDS was considered a gay disease, but you have children being born with the disease at no fault of their own. It's something that affects everyone, born or yet to be born. When I saw that scene my soul cried out to God for understanding. We have situations like this because of lack of knowledge. Because of the lack of knowledge of the parents and the world about HIV/AIDS we have senseless infections and death. You need to know your status. Everyone should. That is why the Bible says that God's people perish for the lack of knowledge. We have to educate ourselves in order to protect ourselves.

You realize that many people look up to you for what you have accomplished in the entertainment industry. They look at what you do in the movies and some try and emulate you. Do you feel that pressure when it comes to the public and how you are perceived?
People watch tapes or dvds of me and pick up some of my ways. When you are in that business, people may take things that they see and use them in their own lives. I realize, that some of the things they pick up on aren't good, including unprotected sex. Because of that I feel a certain responsibility to conduct myself in a way that is accountable to my fans. I'm particularly proud that through my work I improved the situation for my fellow black performers and that I helped open doors for other minorities within the adult industry. Also that I projected a black masculinity that many have found in some ways attractive and admirable.

That last question is a great transition into how you separate who you really are (Edgar Gaines) from the character you created on film (Bobby Blake). How much do the two differ and how much are they alike?
I had created a name and a certain type of character that I wanted to portray and that is what I did. A lot of what people see on film is me, of course, and I enjoyed portraying that persona. Inevitably people were more interested in who I portrayed than who I really was. That was the persona I put out there, so I understand that. But after I had taken that persona as far as I could go I felt a need for people to get to know the real me.

On your website http://www.bobbyblake.net there is a video interview that address your view of Gay Marriage as well as a posting on your website that addresses it as well. Tell our readers about your stance on the issue.
There have been quite a few people who have come up to me or written to me saying they agree with my view on this. I don't believe in gay marriage. However, I will support anyone else's decision to do it: it's between that person and God, and you have to live according to your faith. I do believe in civil partnerships, though: two people in a relationship, whatever their sex, should be allowed to arrange their lives in relation to hospital visitation rights, living wills, inheritance and all those things. All of us should have equality in law. But faith is something different, and I cannot change what I believe is God's will.


Another issue that you address in the book is that of drag queens and how you refused to do a scene with a man dressed in drag. If you were being paid to have sex, why not do the scene?
I wasn't going to do a scene with a drag queen because that's not my type: drag turns me off sexually. I have friends that are female impersonators, but I am not sexually attracted to them. That is true with all people, gay or straight: you know what you like and what you don't. And I was at that level of success within the industry where I had broad approval of who I worked with and who I didn't. Obviously the sex is hotter when your partner turns you on.


What do you want people to learn about you after reading the book MY LIFE IN PORN?
That there is a great difference between the actor and the person they portray. And whether you are Bobby Blake or Denzel Washington we all want the same thing: to be loved and to be able to love others.

What do you hope they learn about themselves?
I want them to see the importance of learning who they really are and dealing with that. I want them to be real and honest with themselves, face up to the things they want to work on and honestly work on them. It's also important that they realize that you may lose all of your material things but there is one thing that can't be taken away from you and that is knowledge. Knowledge is power. It is authority. When the career is gone then reality sets in. You have to be able to live with yourself.

Thank you again, Bobby, for this look into your life. We appreciate your providing such a revealing look into who you are and how we can learn from your journey. For more information about you or to order the book MY LIFE IN PORN: "The Bobby Blake Story" they can visit you online at http://www.bobbyblake.net.

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Take Ten: Marcia Ann Gillespie, co-author of MAYA ANGELOU: A GLORIOUS CELEBRATION

Conversations Book Club has had its share of exclusive interviews since 2004, however, this is one of the most powerful ones ever! Marcia Ann Gillespie, one of the co-authors of MAYA ANGELOU: A Glorious Celebration took out time out of her busy schedule to talk about herself, her relationship with Dr. Angelou and why this book was a labor of love.


Marcia, thank you for taking out the time to talk with us. Before we get into your current project involving the life of Maya Angelou, tell our readers about who you are.
I am an African American woman, who takes great joy and pride in my ancestry and in being part of this extraordinary tribe of survivors and achievers, dreamers and believers. I was born and raised in a village on Long Island New York amidst a Black community made up mainly of folk from the south, North Carolina in particular. The youngest of two daughters born into a family of strivers and activists, I was constantly being reminded to do well in school, encouraged to read and to ask questions, to use my mind.


What role did your parents have in the way you evolved as a person?
My folks were people of deep faith who always strove to live the song. Both were natural leaders: My mom headed the PTA and served on the town’s board of education. My father headed the local civic association and his local Masonic lodge. Both were active in the NAACP and engaged in civil rights. And although my father had little formal education, he was determined that we were going to get the educational opportunities that he’d been denied. From them I learned the importance of standing up for the things you believe in. They were my role models and my heroes who always encouraged me to dream and to go for my dreams, to take pride in myself, and believe in myself, and to live in the world.

I had the great fortune of coming of age in the midst of the modern civil rights movement and to be a foot soldier in the struggle, taking part in protests, marches and rallies. I went to college (Lake Forest College) on scholarships in 1962, majored in American studies and planned to go to grad school after working for a couple of years to save money. When I graduated in 1966 I was hired as a researcher at Time Inc in New York City and discovered that I loved working on books and magazines.

Many know you from your years with Essence Magazine. Tell us about how that developed.
In 1970 I was working on a Black history book and fired up about the need for more books and magazines that told our story when Essence magazine was launched.

I never imagined that one year later I would be the editor in chief. It was likely a fairy tale come true. For the rest of the decade I served as the editor and turned what had been a floundering publication into the fastest growing magazine in America. But far more important every day I was working to celebrate, inspire and inform Black women, helping to sing our song. When I decided to leave Essence after the magazine’s 10th anniversary I did so knowing that it was and would be an enduring success and now it was time for me to test my wings.

I moved to Jamaica in the West Indies and lived and worked there for several years. When I returned to the States I became more involved with the Women’s Movement and became a contributing editor at Ms. magazine writing a regular column, then the magazine’s executive editor and later the editor in chief. In 2002 I stepped down as Ms magazine’s editor in chief, after ten years in that capacity. Now I’ve started a new phase as a full time writer.


Your friendship with Dr. Angelou has spanned many years. Why did you think it was the time now to put together a tribute of her life now?
I’ve known Dr. Maya Angelou and called her friend for more than 35 years, since she reached out to me when I was a fledgling editor in chief at Essence. But I never expected or planned to write a book about her. Dr. Richard Long, one of my collaborators on this project, was the one who came up with the idea of doing a scrapbook with Rosa Johnson Butler (Dr A’s niece and archivist) using some of the photos from her archives. I was asked to join the party after their original idea didn’t quite pan out.

Although I’ve known Dr Angelou for a very long time and spent many many wonderful days in her company and home I had no idea that she was such a great pack rat who kept hundreds of photos, and all drafts of her many works, as well as so many other things from her journey. I spent several days in North Carolina exploring and marveling at this treasure trove and in the midst of it I realized that instead of a scrapbook we needed to do a full biography celebrating the extraordinary woman and her remarkable life. I immediately began reading and rereading everything she had written, the interviews she’s given over the years, and many of the articles and profiles that have been written about her. I also drew on the many, many conversations that we have shared in the past and continued to share as I worked on the manuscript. And then for the next eight months I wrote and rewrote the book.

In the midst of writing the book and after I’d completed the manuscript Rosa Johnson Butler, Janet Hill, the editor of this book, and I also spent days over many months going over every photo, culling and editing. Once we made our final selects Rosa sorted through the rights and permission, tracking down and reaching out to the many photographers whose work we wanted to use. I then began to work on the captions, often spending hours with Dr. Angelou discussing each photo and invariably getting wonderful anecdotes from her, many of which I incorporated in the final draft of the book.

The book was co-written with Rosa Johnson Butler and Richard Long with a foreword by Oprah Winfrey. How did the entire process develop?
It took several years to get this book completed, more than originally anticipated: computer crashes, personal emergencies and other life complications, as well as the challenge of getting all the permissions from so many different people and organizations. At times I’m sure we all despaired ever getting through it all, but the one person who kept faith was our editor.

When all was said and done last year, I suggested that we time the publication to coincide with Dr. Angelou’s 80th birthday and everyone agreed. In retrospect I think the all the delays we experienced along the way was really in divine order. This book was written to honor and celebrate Maya Angelou life and work. Publishing it to coincide with this milestone birthday was a perfect bouquet from us to her. Thanks to Rosa and Richard who asked Oprah to write the forward made even sweeter by her heartfelt contribution.

I was on pins and needles waiting for the book to come out because I so wanted Maya to be pleased and other than looking at the photos she had refused to read the manuscript, saying that she wanted to wait until it was in print. More than anything I wanted her to be pleased. To my relief and delight she told me it was “beautiful” and that she loved the writing, the photos, the design. We sat in her kitchen one day and she paid me the ultimate compliment of reading passages of the book that she particularly loved back to me. I was in tears.

One of things that I have learned from her life is the need to take advantage of the opportunities we are given. What are some of the lessons you have learned from her?
You ask what are some of the lessons I’ve learned from Maya Angelou? I hardly know where to begin there are so many. I hope I’ve learned to become more gracious, thankful and giving from her example. She is one of the most thoughtful people I know. I’ve learned to be a better friend from her because she constantly emphasizes the importance of caring for our friendships. I’ve learned to laugh at myself more and to be more of a risk taker because time and time again I’ve watched her step out on faith and heard her laugh about her own missteps and foibles. I’ve learned to be a better listener from her and that sometimes silence is the best response because when you are in her company you are always aware that she is constantly listening to things said and unspoken. She listens with her entire being and she remembers everything.

Although I don’t share her gift of total recall, I most certainly do try to follow her example and have discovered so much about myself and others as a result. I’ve learned the value of sweet speech from her. I’ve listened closely as she’s challenged and/or corrected someone with carefully chosen words that bring honey not hurt. And I am always reminded of the importance of doing ones personal and professional homework by watching how disciplined she is in her pursuit of information, in how hard she works at her writing, in her quest for greater self understanding and spiritual growth.

Can you share with our readers how she felt when you all presented the project?
I hope that readers, especially younger readers of this book will come away more committed to pursuing their own dreams. Maya Angelou’s life reminds us that the road may not always be straight, that there will be challenges, that we may stumble and occasionally lose our way, but one can pick oneself up and forge on. You have to be prepared to work at living, not simply being alive. If you find something you love, discover your talent(s) don’t waste it, work at perfecting it. Respect yourself and others. Have faith in yourself and always keep faith with the higher power, the Creator of it all.

The book was released just days before her 80th birthday, her birthday being the same day that Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was assasinated. What significance does the day have for you seeing that we celebrate her life and his death?
You're right, the release of this book also coincides with the 40th anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King’s assassination on April 4th which is also Maya Angelou’s birthday--a bittersweet coincidence for her and for us all. These two great Americans, great human beings were friends and colleagues who shared a profound and abiding belief in the possibilities of humankind. In so many ways in her life and work, Dr Angelou has been expressing his philosophy as well as hers.

You have devoted many years of your life to sharing your love of words. What else is in the works for you in the future?
Words have so much power to inspire, transform, inform, to bring joy, love and laughter. Reading is one of my passions. I do love books. I love reading them and I’m determined to keep writing books of my own. Currently I’m working on a memoir about my life and Black life in the 1970s its called When Blacks Became Americans because this was the period when we began to really move into the mainstream of America and claim our places at the table. It was also the period when I was the editor in chief of Essence and in that capacity met and interacted with so many of the folk who were blazing new trails for us all. So its my personal story but it’s also a social history which—fingers crossed—I hope will resonate for many readers.
When it comes to giving advice to others I would echo the advice Maya Angelou’s mother gave to her—“just do your work”.

What advice would you have for aspiring writers, actors or anyone who is looking to be a professional in the arts?
You may not ever become rich or famous, but you can be good at what you do. So take pride in your work, keep perfecting your work, but always strive to enrich your life, count your blessings, love and nurture you friends and family, build strong positive relationships and take time to notice, explore and savor the wonders of this world and of this life cause we only have this one shot at it.

Marcia, thank you so much for your time. We look forward to your upcoming work.